Have you heard of the boy who is mostly ears?

Have you heard of the boy who is mostly ears?
He’s had it since birth, or so it appears,
And yet I am told that the poor boy hears
Most amazingly well.

He has a small brother who’s mostly nose.
It all sort of runs in the family, I s’pose.
They say that whenever his hooter he blows,
He gives his poor brother hell!

His mother and father are mostly feet,
A curious sight as they walk down the street.
In fact, the whole family is rather off-beat,
Yet they cope quite remarkably well.

Yes, a boy with great ear-lobes which flap in the breezes,
Who cries out in pain when a butterfly sneezes;
Another boy highly allergic to pollen,
Whose massive red nostrils are dripping and swollen,
And parents who’ve found that a small chain-saw fails
To properly cope with their mighty toe-nails.

Well, they’ve just had a daughter. Surprise, surprise!
The poor little darling is mostly eyes!

© Stephen Whiteside 1983